‘My husband forces himself on me’

MARY PHIRI writes A 36-year-old woman of Twapia Township in Ndola complained in a local court that her husband forced himself on her each time he wanted to have sex. The woman, who has since been granted divorce, said her husband would cause so much pain on her private parts after forceful sex against her will. In this matter, Violet Chibwe sued Amon Sandala 40, of the same township for divorce due to marital disputes. The case came before Kabushi Local Court presiding Magistrate Mildred Namwizye. She said the man was a womaniser and that she caught him with another woman while had also impregnated another one, who later died. Chibwe said she could no longer cope with her husband’s extreme infidelity.  She was fed up with her husband’s way of life and just wanted out of the marriage adding that the two got married in 2008 and have three children together. “Everything became sour, he does not support me or buy me clothes, I always borrow clothes from my younger sisters,” she said. Chibwe said when he got a job and moved to Twapia, he still continued with his womanizing ways and would not provide for the family. He even chased her out of their matrimonial bedroom and she started sleeping in the children’s bed room. Chibwe added that he always forced himself on her whenever he wanted to have sex which caused her so much pain on her private parts and her husband later decided to take her back to her parents’ house.  In defence, Sandala said when he married his wife the two had lived in harmony and problems in the marriage started in 2013 when they went to live in Twapia. He said he gave his wife some money to start up a business which later became as a weapon of arriving home late and drunk. Sandala told the court that whenever she wanted to go out drinking she would take the children to her parents’ house and went out with other men and would not return home for six good days. Sandala said he chased his wife because she would not allow him to touch her and for many days they would not meet as man and wife.  He said at some point he had taken her to the victim support unit because she never did her duties as a wife and could not cook. “How can a normal woman tell her nine-year-old child to cook food for me, I am tired and disappointed in her behaviour,” he said. The court granted divorce and said that they both contributed to problems in their home.   The court ordered the couple to share property they acquired when they were together and ordered Sandala to be paying child support of K400 every month. The Sun